cycles

The man who accepts Western values absolutely, finds his creative faculties becoming so warped and stunted that he is almost completely dependent on external satisfactions, and the moment he becomes frustrated in his search for these, he begins to develop neurotic symptoms, to feel that life is not worth living, and, in chronic cases, to take his own life.
-Paul Robeson


alive
energy quivering
like coffee saturated
hands trying to hold
steady the ecstasy
of an ephemeral
joy.
this too shall pass.
crash!
shaking hands
cannot control
cannot keep
something so
slippery
and fleeting
as true joy.
this too has passed.
and on a moutain
stroll i gain
momentum
as i begin to see
the peak above me,
begin to remember
that joy,
no matter how ephemeral,
sustains us
makes us alive
gives us hope.
each step is
motivated by the taste
of something
i remember, i
seek again.
the peak is clear
i am near
my hands were
steady but begin
to quiver
grasping
for purpose.